Sunday, February 15, 2009
A couple posts ago, I joked about asking for a cut of the stimulus bill. Well maybe I wasn't joking after all:
"wireless and broadband deployment grant programs
(including transfer of funds to Mister Pterodactyl for the Mister Pterodactyl Personal Economic Stimulus Program)
For necessary and unnecessary expenses related to the Wireless and Broadband Deployment Grant Programs established by section 6002 of division B of this Act, $2,825,000,000, of which $1,000,000,000 shall be for Wireless Deployment Grants and $1,825,000,000 shall be for Broadband Deployment Grants: Provided, That an additional $50,000 shall be paid directly to Mister Pterodactyl in the form of subsidized loans that do not require repayment. Provided Further, That the funds be used by Mister Pterodactyl to schooling or for whatever. Provided Even Further, That Mister Pterodactyl will receive free Green Bay Packers tickets for life. Provided Even Further Still, That Mister Pterodactyl shall be treated as a cabinet-level appointment for the purpose of income tax reporting, and therefore no taxes shall be paid on any of the aformentioned benefits. And one more thing: Murtha is hereby expelled from Congress, effective immediately upon enactment."
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